When thinking about self care commitments, what leads you to the well-being you are hoping for?

Before one takes up a practice of self support or self healing it is essential to investigate if we are engaging in self care with a “little s, self” or “big S, Self.”  In care that is a “big S, Self” there is an ego drive motivating the task, and a goal that leads to some kind of achievement or attainment.  In my view this only furthers the imbalance and stress.  The intention to govern the body, as a possession of “me or mine” leads to greater disconnection and is not a strong place for true healing to occur.  In the “little s” approach, one acknowledges the mysteries of the body, mind and nature as a process that is unfolding rather than a place to arrive at.  This process is then lived into as a unique dance between the elements of self-will and self-surrender.  From this “little s, self” we come to know that how we engage in self care is every bit as important at what kind of self care we are engaging in.

From a perspective of how I intend to take care of myself I see my need for the following:

  1. To value my being as much as much as my doing.  In service of this, to “allow” more time for meandering walks, sitting on the grass, going slowly.
  2. To take in what is here more often than seeing what is missing. In service of this, to appreciate the simple moments of self care that are available no matter how full the day: a deep breath before driving to work in the morning, pausing to feel a hello hug when greeting family and friends, tasting water as I quench my thirst.
  3. To allow my mind to clear as a gift to myself rather than a goal to achieve.  I do not believe in a definition of meditation that speaks of “emptying” the mind.  However, I can relish the moments when the mind empties itself, for a fleeting second, and enjoy the momentary setting aside of the effort to think.

What are you needing?  What self care practices do you desire from your “little s, self”?

Good thoughts to you!